If you're here in Rori Raye Siren Land for the first time, and wonder if I'm a real person, a woman even, and how I could possibly help you get the relationship you want as quickly as I say I can...welcome!
First - I'm not a "newbie."
Not only am I not among the "new crop" of love and relationship "coaches" out there - I've personally trained a great many of the ones you've heard of.
I've been around, reaching literally millions of women every day, since 2003, when I graduated from Coaches Training Institute (CTI.)
When I started, there was barely anything on the "internet." If you googled "relationship" you got maybe three names.
When I graduated CTI, I thought of all kinds of coaching, and within a year it became obvious that what I'd done in my own marriage (literally turned it around...) and in my own head (I'd gone from doormat, crumb-taking-people-pleaser to a woman who realized she had needs that weren't being met) would work for every woman.
I saw out there words like "confidence" and "self-love" and "feminine and masculine" being thrown around - yet, not ONE single thing I read (and I read everything I could find) told me HOW to GET that confidence, femininity and self-love.
So I started cataloging and writing down everything I'd done to bring my husband closer in every way. What I'd done to finally start feeling happy.
I included everything I'd ever read that was helpful, and added my personal, step-by-step "How" to the generalized concepts and psychology I saw.
I printed it up, did a free workshop for my friends, and found myself developing new "Hows" as I taught from what I'd written.
I figured out the internet
Before I knew it, I had a book to offer, a weekend workshop filled, a full coaching client practice, and - I'd figured out the internet.
Steve Warwick, a friend from a networking group I'd joined, was a computer, marketing, website design genius - and he and I bonded as best friends forever under the "nerd" banner and he helped me to grow my reach and my brand.
I discovered I could learn to "code," I could learn how things worked, how things flowed from one webpage to another, how to connect my writing from one page to another, and from one place on the internet to another.
This was when myspace was the only game in town, and Facebook was not even a glimmer.
Before I knew it, I was an entrepreneur. I had ads running to 60 different pages, I was writing all day long - and being read - A LOT (for example one million views on ezine articles)
My dream of being a writer, the dream I'd put away in a drawer to support my first husband's dream of being a writer - became real.
My book, Have The Relationship You Want, sold copies every day. I coined the name Modern Siren, and began to define everything I was talking about, all the amazing things happening with my clients and readers every day with this completely feminine-centric interpretation of the Siren legend.
I made it about us women - not about men.
So - if what you've read in one of my blog or Facebook posts sounds like anti-feminist drivel to you, if it sounds like I'm about being demure and coy and sweet and "strategic" with men - I want you to know it's completely the opposite.
I want you to know what being a Modern Siren is all about.
It is, first and foremost, about being "authentic."
And, since "authentic" is one of the most overused words in all of self-help on the internet and in bookstores - The Rori Raye Modern Siren Method is about the HOW of being authentically you.
It's just so easy to "say" these things. To "tell" you to be this way or that way.
And - we're all different!
Some of us have hugely painful backgrounds, with years and years of experiential training constantly thinking and doing everything based on that pain.
Many of us have no idea at all how to tune into our DESIRE and live from THERE.
If we can't find our deepest, most passionate feelings about ourselves and our lives - even in general ways - how can we just "be authentic!"
Most of us cannot ever even know who "we" truly are! We are so MANY things! Every moment is a new moment, and we are new IN it.
So - my take on "authenticity" is not some general "realness" concept - it's about finding the truth for you in every single moment - connecting with THAT, and then SPEAKING it, out loud, to anyone near you who is actually interacting with you.
All of a sudden - authenticity takes on several other aspects.
One is fear.
Fear comes up, because speaking what we're truly experiencing and feeling in any moment is a terrifying, risky move for almost all of us women.
We've been hugely punished throughout time for being "mouthy," or simply "wanting" the "wrong" things.
And so we tend to want to sit back in the shadows and get the lay of the land before we say our truth - OR - we rebel against that and just spit out whatever comes up for us at any moment. We either sit, ponder, shut up or shut down - or we react. And we pay for both later.
The Rori Raye Method™ is something completely different.
It takes practice, just like learning the piano or any language. AND - it takes someone to practice WITH - which is what my concept of Circular Dating is (yes I created the term and the practice of Circular Dating.)
Don't be fooled by anything that SOUNDS like Circular Dating out there. This is not Rotational Dating, or The Man Plan - or any other strategic or tactical "dating thing" out there.
Circular Dating literally has nothing to do with the normal concept of "dating!" It has practically nothing to do with the man you're Circular Dating at any given moment!
What Circular Dating does for you is create a therapeutic situation for you to practice in.
If this seems heartless to the men who are interacting with you, who think they're "dating" you - rest assured that they need the practice also.
Amazingly enough, what happens when you practice the Modern Siren Tools out there with Circular Dating is that everything changes.
Instead of the stressful and dreadful idea of "Dating in order to meet your Mr. Right," you feel (and radiate that "vibe") like you're simply practicing "Tools" called "Circular Dating" in order to GET confidence, authenticity, self-love - AND - to learn to speak your truth in the moment no matter HOW scary it is.
It takes practice - and this is where the HOW comes in.
Five years ago, Rori Raye Relationship Coach Training began and I took everything I had learned from creating over a dozen successful programs, speaking from the stage and marketing my relationship methods - and I have had the pleasure of helping to create some superstar coaches you may know of: Helena Hart, Leigha Lake, Adrienne Everheart, Sami Wunder, Vero Vidal, Andrada Dan, Viona Haven, Carrie Stanfield....so many more.
Every year, I'm training another 20 brilliant new coaches, and offering Siren School Live programs where you can work with one of my amazing Rori Raye coaches in many different ways.
The Rori Raye Method of Coaching, and The Modern Siren Method of getting the love and relationship you want are not strategic, or tactical... so how does it work?
And... why does it seem like I'm saying that women "need to do all the work"?
In my blog posts and letters, you'll see that everything is geared towards an inner shift inside YOU, accomplished by core Siren Tools like "Feeling Messages."
And you're not doing that "shift" to please a man, to soften up a man, to GET anything from a man.
Instead, you're doing it because you KNOW that authenticity, congruity, speaking your truth, getting what you want is your absolute BIRTHRIGHT!!!! You were not created to "fake" your way through life.
You were not created to try to "get" something from any man...you were created for that man to want YOU.
This goes for work, too!
If you have desire - you're in feminine energy.
How you go about getting what you desire is another thing entirely.
Because in Siren coaching and all my writing I can only talk to YOU (and not to your men) - we're all we have to work with!
So, of COURSE everything is geared towards YOU and how you can not only "improve"your love life, but how you can completely turn it around!
- To be led by your desire is to be led by your feminine.
- And: To try to figure out how to get to your desire is completely masculine - and will never work!
Men will never see "respect" and "juicy-turned-on-love" in the same breath.
Instead, we need to simply reserve the word "respect" for a man, and let all men be "IN AWE" of us women!
So - for now, think about it this way: Your brain needs to follow your emotions and desire, not the other way around.
I welcome you to everything Siren, and to see you get what your heart desires in the world of love, romance and relationship, by Leaning Back (yes, I created this concept too,) Circular Dating, Speaking your emotions in a drama-less Siren way (instead of your thoughts).
I also hope I may one day train you to be a professional coach, so you can share what you've learned and experienced, and perhaps live the "work" part of your dream life, too.