Here's a great question from "confused":
"Hi Rori. I have been living with my boyfriend for about 8 months. I am so in love with this man. He told me yesterday that he loves me, but is not in love with me.
Do I stay with him?
Or, do I owe it to myself to find someone who feels the same way about me?"
Confused - you owe yourself the decision to make choices that are at least aimed at making you happy.
How that will look is complex sometimes.
And this one depends a lot on how old you are, and what you want.
If what you want is to be passionately loved right now, and you don't feel good being with a man who "says" he feels less for you than you feel for him - then I say get outta there, or ask him to leave - or just declare the two of you friends and start dating other men!
(I've seen this work well many times - but not so much if you're really "in love" with him - way too hard on the cells of your body.)
Subscribe To My Personal Relationship Advice Newsletters, And...
The 5 Steps I Used To Create Emotional Intimacy With My Man...
...learn to "go soft" with your man, no matter what...
On the other hand, he may not really know what he feels at all, he may be "tippable" - and my "Third Way" will WORK!
That means - go get yourself a life, raise your Degree Of Difficulty, get happy and involved in things beside him, start Circular Dating ("CDing"is NOT about 'dating"!), stop pining after him, and learn some new skills in life, love and sex.
(Things like lectures, classes, acting class, pole dancing, ecstatic dance, church and temple, spiritual events and meditation centers. Meetup.com hikes and all kinds of charity walks. Film groups and restaurant and cooking groups and classes. Salsa dancing...)
Just because you live with him doesn't mean you have to be available to him around the clock - or have to share everything with him.
We can help you with this on Siren Island. Literally, we can hold your hand, give you words to say - "Script" you! - and lay out a "Plan."
Try us out for only $1 for 7 days, and plan on staying the full month for only $29 and see what happens for you in just ONE month! I think you'll have a phenomenal experience on The Island, and things will change for you.
Often, what a man is really talking about - though he won't say it - is sex.
We women ALL OWE OURSELVES great, sensational, emotionally intimate sex that fills up our "emotional buckets." And lots of it.
And when we don't believe that, and instead begin focusing on pleasing men - we lose all the glamour and exceptional experiences sex has to offer, and end up losing our romantic connection with a man.
On Siren Island, we work with everything - to turn everything in your life into the feminine. Sex is SO highly, totally feminine - and yet, we've all managed to believe it's a "masculine thing." It's not.
And the truth is - all a good man wants to do s make YOU feel good. It's our responsibility to know what that kind of "feeling good" feels like!
Look for Debra Darlen on Siren Island - she's so wise, so amazing, and can help you FAST around everything sexual, sensual, and YOU oriented.
Let's see what he does once you get going with these tips, and perhaps Siren Island...